Words - words - words....

Indian Ruby had a wonderful reply to my last posting: Perhaps our words are the arms we are missing. Wow - what a sentence! Our words are able to build up, tear down, move us, make us hopeful and filled with despair. A blog is more than anything only words. The only thing you see here are words - no music, no movies or pictures - only words. Through words we are here to share life. As Indian Ruby says: our words might be the arms we are missing.

Nothing to say?

Have you ever had the feeling that you have nothing to say? There are so many words in this world, and after browsing a few of the blogs of the web I almost feel empty. Sometimes when I'm in a meeting at work I feel the same. I listen to others say all the right things, and my head feels blank. I love to listen and to read all the thoughts and to be challenged by all the people out there, but I start to wonder: What do I have to say? Is there anything more to say in this world or has it all been said, all been challenged and thought through. I don't know. Maybe, even probably it is so, but why then go on saying all the things that has been said? I guess the word is communication. We are all communicators in some way or another. The question is what do I communicate? I'm not shy at all, I enjoy conversations and discussions tremendously, and I do it often, but when it comes to settings where I have to say something in a big group, I go blank. That's me, and during the last couple of weeks I've had a bit of the same feelings againgst this blog. I wonder - do I have anything to say? I guess the next days and weeks will show, at least I guess I should try - even though it has been said before....

Oslo - can it get any better?

This week Aftenposten, one of the major newspapers here in Norway, presented a survey involving hundreds of inhabitants of Oslo. The question was how people like living here. 9 or 10 people either loves or likes the city, while one of ten thinks it’s OK or bad. For me it’s no surprise. I’ve always really enjoyed living here. The combination of culture and nature in this city is its strongest asset. Concert halls, movie theaters, a lot of museums, art galleries and then the fjord and thousands of miles of forest a few minutes by subway from the city center – can it get any better? I don’t think so. I have some favorite spots on this planet: New York is one, Paris is another – but, amazingly enough – Oslo is definitely up there with these cities in my mind. Is there nothing bad about Oslo? Sure it is. There are a lot of people that are struggling; with drugs, with prostitution and crime. On my way to work I meet them every day, but I’ve never had any bad experiences myself. I don’t want our city in all areas to show off a polished surface where everything is slick and without scratches. This is not a theme park, but a city. I like that – diversity – both among people and in the different areas of the city. In other words, I live my life here in Oslo, and it’s great to live in a city that I really enjoy living in, and where most others share that joy! You are welcome to experience it yourself – it’s here and it’s waiting for you!

Friends in faraway places

Oh what a joy to open my mailbox today and find e-mails from three great friends I haven't heard from in a very long time! It reminded me how a few lines in a mail keeps us in community with each other and helps us to feel connected. Thank you Matt in Seattle, thank you Forrest in Seattle and thank you Christine in Vancouver for writing these mails today and sending them to me. You are indeed friends in faraway places. To everyone reading this today: Perhaps it's time to send an e-mail to an old friend somewhere in this world. Do it today!

Insomnia?

After having a long vacation I was back at work today. I've loved the long nights and long mornings for the last couple of weeks. Going to sleep at about 2 AM and waking up at about 11. It's actually great to be able to turn around life like this for awhile, but today the alarm went at 6:45. I was really tired because I wasn't able to sleep before 3 AM - but I'm OK. Actually it feels like a jet-lag - trying to cope with everyday life again. Back to work and back in the routines.

It's the ordinary days that make up most of our lives and I believe we have to take care of these days and nights that we get. Being 35 I realize that I don't live forever. I've always known that, but now I feel it. Maybe I've already lived half of my life? Man, I'm glad to be alive. I sincerely hope that knowing my mortality makes me live my life to the fullest!

Making room for rage

Hi! Why am I here as a blogger? I was actually inspired by a good friend of mine who opened her blog a couple of days ago (http://indiarubyflower.blogspot.com/ ). I thought it was wonderful to se her on the web - and I thought - why not join the community? After reading another blog for months( http://www.thursdaypm.org/blog/rachelle/ ) I have felt really touched by what Rachelle's been writing - and it's inspiring to read everyday wisdom. Rachelle is a very wise woman.

A friend of mine told me once that he thought that I should be less analytical and more active, but now I think: Perhaps blogging could be a kind of action? Being me is partly being analytical, and this is a forum for that. I don't know if there will be anyone reading this, but I'm here. I'm writing, and sharing, and analyzing and trying to find my way in this wonderful, but confusing world. I'm here and you're welcome to share in this frightening, hopeful and great journey called life.

The tsunami in Asia has really been on my mind in the last week. I stayed in a hotel at Patong Beach a few years ago, I walked the beaches of Phi Phi island and I stayed in a shabby hostel at Penang island in Malaysia. It's been surreal to watch these locations totally destroyed and chaotic. People died those places and paradise is suddenly hell, and there is no escape - I've been there - I've stood at the exact places where the photographers and the CNN reporters stand today. Why do some people live - and others die? If the earthquake had happened a few years ago I could have been among the dead ones. I don't know why some people die. I think about it a lot, but I don't find a lot of answers. The Bishop of Oslo said something wise today. He said that in situations like now we should make room for anger. Being angry at God and letting ourselves ask questions. I guess this is my prayer this night: Help us to make room for rage when there are no answers to all the why's of our lives.